I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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