i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize