the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize