thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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