There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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