I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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