I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
