new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
