I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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