How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
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