weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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