This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
