can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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