I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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