jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
