It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
