I wish I could punch you in the face.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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