im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
