my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
