OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Blow job season was short but glorious.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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