She's JV to your varsity
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize