I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
