She said her name was "party"
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
