I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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