I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
