IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
