did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
