if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
