you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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