If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
