I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize