no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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