whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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