At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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