You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
