If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize