TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize