I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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