:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
