He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
