the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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