people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I wear drunk well.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize