I wanna bring you to show and tell
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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