if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
