The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
