evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Just puked most of my soul out..
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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