Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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