pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
