i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
