I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
