i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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